Every day we are bombarded with opportunities where we have to make a decision to say yes or no. Invitations, work events, life requirements and all things that come our way require us to attempt to balance our lives in ways that keep everyone happy and us sane and healthy. However, are we always making the right decisions? I think that the answer to that question comes at the point that we are making the consideration of the yes or no answer and what we are using to justify our decision.
When you are presented with the question that requires an answer, how are you evaluating which answer you are going to give? Whether or not the answer is a healthy one lies in the reasoning that your are using to determine what your answer is going to be. If the answer is yes only because you don’t have the ability to say no to the other person, then the reasoning is suspect. If the answer is yes because you have evaluated the effect saying yes is going to have on your other responsibilities and your own desires, then I would venture to say that is likely a healthy answer. The more we say yes simply because we can’t find it within ourselves to say no to the person or task because of how they are going to feel, the less true we are to our own needs.
I have written before that there are only 1,440 minutes in a day. As we try and juggle all that life is requiring from us, the more unhealthy our yesses are, the less time we have for that life balance that we all try and maintain. Ultimately, that means that it really is okay to say no. Other’s reactions to our no answer should not be the sole determination that we use in our decision making regarding how we are going to respond. Yes, we need to be considerate of other’s feelings. However, I would say that it is most likely that we all know those who will always expect a yes answer from us no matter what our own life needs may be.
So, my answer to the question that I posed in the title of this post is yes, it is okay to say no. When the proper rationale is used and we have balanced our own personal needs, then no is perfectly acceptable and sometimes even absolutely necessary.
Have a great day and remember to be the reason someone smiles.
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